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Reuniting the Twins
Ernest: "Well, this place has a pretty high gullibility level." Charles: "What do you mean by 'gullibility level'? That shit doesn't make any sense." Ern: "Well, I mean, they're easily fooled. Gullible. That's that I'm talking about" Ted's demise and premise Zomboss: "YOU'RE FIRED!" Edward: "YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RESPECT TO ME, ZOMBOSS!" Zomboss: "If only you took your punishment, Zoologist! I wouldn't have been like this!" Ted: "I ain't gonna take your bullshit! OK, I don't want any of my fucking shoes taken off! I don't want my pants to be torn down! And you say that there's no other option? That's utter bullshit!" Zomboss: "Well-well-well, there's literally no other way, goddammit! That's all I could do!" Ted: "If you really wanna know why, that fucking goggle-bitchslapping was the fucking last straw! I'm done with your bullshit, OK? You're fucking unfair! Why don't you punish yourself whenever you do a fucking mistake? I AIN'T YOUR FUCKING SLAVE, YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Zomboss: "WHAT DID YOU SAY?" Ted: "YOU'RE NOT MY FUCKING BOSS! JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE 'BOSS' IN YOUR SURNAME IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT TO PEOPLE!" ZB: "Then get the fuck outta here! I ain't gonna need your shit! You're just a fake-ass piece of shit like the others!" Ted: "OK! If that's what you want, I'll QUIT!" ZB: "Fine, go fuck yourself!" Ted: "Fuck you, and fuck all of your nonsense!" (leaves, extremely pissed) (CUT TO random zombies noticing in the background) Zombies: "Brains? Brains?" (CUT TO Ernest conversation) Ernest: "Um, I'm not sure if his phone number still works, I mean, it's been a few weeks and the number's always been inactive." Char: "Well, just try it out, maybe it will work now." Rach: "Yeah, I mean, you don't really have a reliable person other than him, right?" Ern: "Um, I guess. Fine then." (Ernest calls Ted's phone) (CUT TO phone, displays "Zoologist" phone number) (CUT BACK TO Ted) (phone ringing) Ted: "Oh great. A phone call when I'm so pissed I couldn't talk shit correctly!" (answers the phone) Ern: "Hey Zoologist, I've got something for us to conversate." Ted: "Oh hey Chemist, um, I'm a bit in a terrible mood now, so can you please call me later?" Ern: "This is important, meet me at 16 Woodhampton St. OK?" Ted: "Um, I have tell you this but I was just fired from Zomboss's Laboratory of Science. I might need to go home first." Ern: "Fine, but please come here ASAP. I need you." Ted: "OK then, see you there." Ern: "K." (call ends) Ted and Rach Rach: "So, Zoologist? I'm... just a bit curious about what happened to you. I mean, you seem to immediately accept that you should join the plants unlike the others, so there must be something that drives you into it." Ted: "Well, simple. I was fired from Zomboss's shit and I just don't wanna work with him anymore. He's really a fucked up individual and all he does is enslaving us the whole time, day in, day out." Rach: "Damn. Can you tell me a bit more?" Ted: "Well, sure. You know, I was about to lose my shoes and pants when I decided that I could've just ran away from him. That's why." Rach: "Oh. Also, looks like you speak English straight outta the box. Most zombies don't do so and just groan till we perform an interrogation." Ted: "Well, I don't accept being a dumbass moron who shuffles around the street groaning nothing but 'braaaainz', that's just ridiculous you know. I mean, if he could speak whatever he wants, then why shouldn't I too?" Rach: "Maybe he's deceiving them. I mean, he actually let you speak freely, right?" Ted: "Yeah, but I had to whine about him being unfair for a whole 10 minutes just to make him agree." Rach: "Well, he IS unfair in terms of everything." Ted: "Yeah. I'm sick and tired of his utterly nonsensical shit. From the 'only groan' rule all the way to deceiving zombies to only eat brains. I mean, he really is a dick, you know. He never gives a fuck about eeeeeveryone else, and therefore, he's an utter dickhead." Rach: "Mmm-hmm." Ted: "You know what, I already knew I don't need to eat brains to survive in the first place. I knew this guy's gonna be so fucked up and most likely he's telling lies almost the whole time." Rach: "Then why don't you immediately quit when you realize this dude's gonna be that fucked up?" Ted: "I couldn't. I actually saw some of his documents and it said that we need like a year for us to be able to break free from his control, but of course everyone was too scared of doing so. His guards are so tight, escaping wouldn't be a good option. I've seen some of them maiming other zombies to death. I only managed to escape because I've exceeded that one year thing." Rach: "Ah, I see." Ted: "Look, I could help you with anything, OK? I've got enough knowledge to crack open shit he hides. Just don't expect too much though. He never seems to let anyone get inside some of his 'privates'." Rach: "Privates?" Ted: "I mean, shit like prototypes and whatnot." Rach: "Oh." Ted: "There's an exception though. I've built this mind control device using his blueprints and it seems to work well. It's supposed to be a 'top secret' thingy, but he gave it to me due to how 'helpful' I was back then." Rach: "Hmm. Does it work on zombies tho? I mean, putting a zombie subject for mind control?" Ted: "Nah. He's smart enough to not let us do that." Rach: "So what happens when you try it on zombies?" Ted: "Well, nothing's gonna happen on him, as if it just doesn't work at all. I think there's a sensor or something in it that detects whether or not the subject's a zombie." Rach: "Maybe."